LOL, LMBO, HA HA HA, ROTFLMBO...

 Today, I went out with friends for lunch.  It was pretty impromptu; nothing planned out. It wasn't even a group of people that I'd normally get together -- an old friend, a "new-er" friend and the "new-er" friend's boyfriend.  But let me tell you, it was one of the best lunch group outings that I've been to in a looooong time!! Why you ask?!  Well, I'll tell you...LOL.  Because the laughter NEVER stopped!  We laughed about everything....And when I say everything, I do mean everything!  From joking with the waitress, to stories amongst ourselves, cracking jokes on each other, etc, etc. It just went on and on and on...LOL.

Now, I'm the type of person who loves to joke around a lot and have a good laugh whenever possible, and I probably use "LOL" and "LMBO" way too much when typing (notice above, twice already!), and I generally just love to enjoy myself in whatever setting I'm in.  But when you're with a group of friends that you generally care about and you are able to share good laughs, it just puts you in the best mood! 

Of course, there are also scientific reasons for why laughter on a regular basis is beneficial...Laughter helps release enzymes and hormones that are helpful for the normal functioning of various organs, as well as enhances the body to release natural antihistamines. It also activates T-cells, a natural antibiotic produced in the body, and helps boost the immune system and fight infections. Laughter also reduces the levels of certain hormones, which helps relieve stress, depression, anxiety, grief, anger and irritation. It also decreases pain by releasing endorphins, and improves our attentiveness, pulse and heart rate. Laughing has also proven beneficial for the people suffering from hypertension because it helps lower the blood pressure to normal.  Laughter is also a good overall workout for respiratory, abdominal, leg, back and facial muscles; and it tones intestinal functioning, massages abdominal organs and strengthens abdominal muscles. And for those trying to slim down, laughter also helps burn calories and is beneficial for weight loss!!  Now if that isn't a reason to laugh, I don't know what is...LOL. Laughter also offers psychological health benefits such as boosts to your self-confidence and mental strength to cope with conflicts and challenges in life. It also helps people end anxiety and depression. Socially, laughing enhances our ability to connect with others and makes us more energized and increases our interest in daily activities. 

But of course you probably know a few people who just can't let loose; they don't know what it feels like to just enjoy life and laugh over something, anything, nothing...Honestly, I feel sorry for them and their insides...Can you imagine?!  Ugh! LOL.  Anyhow, so maybe that was way more than you needed to know about the benefits of laughter (LOL) but I really just wanted to stress how important it is in your daily life to LAUGH! 

  

So smile, enjoy your time with friends and family, laugh at those corny jokes, laugh at yourself, and learn how to not take things so seriously....Life is too short and laughter feeds the soul!  Hopefully your soul isn't growling for laughter like an empty stomach does for food...LOL. Corny joke? Maybe... :-)

Quote of the day: "The most wasted of all days is one without laughter" ~ E.E. Cummings

I Really Know How it Feels to be Stressed Out....

Let's time travel back to early 2005 for a second...(picture this) I'm in my first semester of grad school.  Things aren't going very well with my first few classes because I am working full-time and learning how to balance my time between school, relationship, work, and other social activities. I'm nervous that my company won't reimburse my tuition if I don't receive a B or higher in my courses.  I am completely stressed out!!  The next thing I know, I'm experiencing chest pains...So bad that it felt like I could have been experiencing a heart attack.  After a few episodes of this, I drag myself to an emergency room.  I have x-rays done, EKGs, sent to a cardiologist for assessment, another EKG and stress tests.  What do they determine from all of these tests?  Basically, nothing...Well, accept for the fact that the chest pains are unexplained, not a heart issue, and likely due to my high stress levels. This was a serious wake up call for me!  I vowed from this point on to learn to deal with my stress better. 

My situation was an extreme wakeup call for me but there are others who aren't so lucky when health related issues rear their head as a result of stress. Stress can cause aches/pains, dizziness and nausea, chest pain and a rapid heartbeat, loss of your sex drive, increase/decrease in your appetite, loss of sleep, isolation, use of drugs, alcohol and other substances, moodiness and irritability, memory problems, racing thoughts, depression, nervous habits, and the list goes on and on.  I mean, who doesn't know what it feels like to deal with stress?!  It's a natural part of life but how we cope with it is what makes the real difference.  You may not recognize the signs of stress but it's necessary to incorporate habits into your lifestyle that combat your daily stresses.

One of my favorite ways of de-stressing is to turn my music up really loud and sing my heart out...LOL.  Now, this may not work for everyone but it's a great stress reliever for me.  I also love to dance so I'll make time to hang out with friends for a night on the town or just stand infront of my bedroom mirror and shake what my momma gave me...LMBO.  Either way, dancing is also a wonderful stress reliever.  I also like to release my stress through other forms of exercise like cardio and a great sex session.  Ok, so sex may not be a viable "form of exercise" but if you're putting in work then it can be...and it also promotes the release of hormones that are natural stress relievers. All great benefits!! LOL.  ;-)  I also like to take a nice hot bath or shower because it seems to help wash all your cares away for the moment and puts my mind at ease.  Sometimes hanging out with friends, either just getting in a few laughs or actually talking about the source of your stress is helpful as well.  There is nothing like a good laugh with great friends!  It's also always good to have a support system and people you can talk to about things that are bothering you; keeping it in does more harm than good.  And I do have to admit that at times a drink, preferably a glass of wine for the extra health benefits, can be a girl's bestfriend at the end of a stressful day.  Oh, and I can't forget the massages and/or pedicure to relax my mind -- it leaves you feeling so peaceful.  Of course there are a ton of other ways to relieve stress but those are just a few things I like to incorporate into my regular routine. 

What do you do to cope with your daily stress?  If you're not doing anything, you may want to consider a new plan of attack...Just know that the more you stress, the harder it is to shut off and it can lead to serious health problems down the road.  I share because I care, people..... :-)

KHurly Girl

Top Foods for Healthy Hair

Ok, so a lot of people think that healthy hair comes from a bottle or as a product of having a good stylist (or your own healthy styling routine) but that’s only partially true. Healthy hair is dependent on what you put on your hair and how you treat your hair (i.e., styling methods) but it is also important to pay attention to what you put in your body as well. A healthy diet will help you grow stronger and healthier cells throughout your entire body, including your hair. But there are some limitations. For example, if you have fine hair then you’ll likely never have thick strands growing from your scalp – no matter what you use on your hair or what you eat, that's just genetics.  But the benefits of a well-balanced diet will likely include good amounts of iron and can promote protein growth which can make a difference.

There are even hair growth promoting products and vitamins that claim to increase the healthiness or length of your hair. I’ve even taken a few of them myself. LOL. But ultimately, these are purely vitamin enriched products and/or multi-vitamins that are just giving you the normal nutrients your hair needs on a regular basis anyway. But be careful because anything in excess can have adverse effects and vitamins are no different.

So, here are a few foods that you can incorporate into your diet to help promote healthy hair.

# 1: Salmon - When it comes to foods that pack a beauty punch, it's hard to beat salmon. Loaded with omega-3 fatty acids, this high-quality protein source is also filled with vitamin B-12 and iron, and is needed to support scalp health.  A deficiency can result in a dry scalp and dull hair.  You can also add 1-2 tbsp of ground flaxseed in your daily diet for some plant-based omega-3 fats.

# 2: Dark Green Vegetables - Spinach, like broccoli and Swiss chard, is an excellent source of vitamins A and C, which your body needs to produce sebum which is the oily substance secreted by your hair follicles, and is the body's natural hair conditioner.  Dark green vegetables also provide iron and calcium.

# 3: Beans - Legumes like kidney beans and lentils should be an important part of your hair-care diet. Not only do they provide plentiful protein to promote hair growth, but ample iron, zinc, and biotin. Biotin deficiencies can also result in brittle hair in rare instances.  It is recommended that you get 3+ cups of lentils or beans each week.

# 4: Nuts - Certain types of nuts such as brazil nuts and walnuts provide selenium (an important mineral for the health of your scalp) and alpha-linolenic acid (an omega-3 fatty acid that may help condition your hair). Cashews, pecans, and almonds are also great sources of zinc. A zinc deficiency can lead to hair shedding.

# 5: Poultry - Chickens and turkeys provide a high-quality protein. Deficiencies in protein can lead to one can weak brittle hair and can result in loss of hair color. Poultry also provides iron with a high degree of bioavailability, meaning your body can easily reap its benefits.

# 6: Eggs - Eggs are one of the best protein sources you can find. They also contain biotin and vitamin B-12, which are important beauty nutrients.

# 7: Whole Grains - Whole grains such as whole-wheat bread and fortified whole-grain breakfast cereals can be helpful in providing healthy dose of zinc, iron, and B vitamins.

# 8: Oysters - Oysters provide a healthy amount of zinc, a powerful antioxidant, in addition to being an aphrodisiac.  But if oysters isn't your thing, you can also get a good dose of zinc from beef and lamb.

# 9: Low-Fat Dairy Products - Products like skim milk and yogurt are great sources of calcium, an important mineral for hair growth. They also contain whey and casein, two high-quality protein sources.  You can even boost their benefits by stirring in a couple of tablespoons of ground flaxseeds or walnuts for omega-3 fatty acids and zinc.

# 10: Carrots - Carrots are an excellent source of vitamin A, which promotes a healthy scalp along with good vision.

So, hurry up and make that grocery list!! Healthy hair is just a Safeway, Giant, Shoppers, Whole Foods, Kroger, Mars, SuperFresh, Food Lion, Wegmans........Ok, ok, you get the point!  Happy shopping!

KHurly Girl

He/She Loves Me...He/She Loves Me Not

Ok, so as a child/teen we played a game called “He Loves Me…He Loves Me Not.” Anyone remember it?! Hopefully, I’m not the only one…LOL. Anyhow, the purpose of the game was to determine whether the object of your affection felt the same way about you or not. So, to refresh your memory a bit -- you’d pick a flower and for each petal that you’d pick off of the flower you’d say “He (or she) loves me” and then alternate with “He (or she) loves me not”…I’m guessing more little girls played this game than boys but you get the point! :-) So when you get to the very last petal, whatever phrase you are on at this point, represents the truth as far as the love (or not) that your object of affection has for you.

Now, why did I rehash this game and the rules behind it? Well, as adults we sometimes struggle with understanding the actions of another person and whether or not their actions constitute love for us. Some would say that if you have to wonder then it’s probably not love and a lot of times I’d have to agree. And when I say love, I mean being in love and not just loving someone. ‘Love’ versus ‘in love’ is a whole other ballgame…LOL. But if you’re still in question, here are a few points to keep in mind that might help you determine if someone is truly in love with you:

• He/she shows interest in your life – He/she asks about your day, family, friends and work; He/she tries to remember whatever you say and do.

Think about it: If he/she shows no interest in the things that encompass your life and fill your day, how could he/she possibly love you? Those things are part of who you are.

• He/she knows exactly what makes you smile, feel special and taken care of.

Think about it: If he/she is selfish and only cares about themselves, then how could they possibly love you? And knowing what makes you smile/feel special/taken care of is not a one-time thing or something that happens only around holidays or other special moments, it should be regularly expressed.

• He/she is very affectionate, attentive, sensitive, considerate, and cares about your needs, wants and desires.

Think about it: Again, this is selfishness at its best. If your mate is only concerned with what you’ve giving in this department and how you address their needs but they never take your needs into consideration -- how can this be love?

• He/she calls (texts or emails) you just because he/she was thinking about you, misses you, or just felt like it.

Think about it: Anyone who has ever experienced love knows that a special person in your life begins to permeate your thoughts on a regular basis. You think of them constantly. Sometimes it’s not always feasible to reach out during the day and let that person know that you’re thinking of them but like most things, if there is a will then there is a way.

• He/she wants to spend as much time with you as is possible. He/she clears up their busy schedule and makes plans just for you.

Think about it: If he/she is always putting others ahead of you (i.e., friends, family, work, etc.) or never making time in their schedule to be with you, how can they possibly love you? Building a loving relationship requires time with that person!

• He/she walks that special extra mile just for you. He/she shares your interests even if he/she doesn't like what you like, puts aside what they could be doing just to talk, listen or do something for you instead.

Think about it: Is it really love if your mate constantly says to you, I don’t like this or that, so I’m not interested in doing it with you or talking about it? Is it really love if they can’t take the time sometimes to talk to you or just listen to how you feel? Probably not.

• He/she tells you how wonderful you make him/her feel and how having you in his/her life enriches it.

Think about it: This is self-explanatory. A person who loves you will express to you in words or actions, and hopefully both, how you make them feel and how special you are to them.

• He/she does small unexpected things to pleasantly surprise you.

Think about it: He/she will send an email message, show up at your workplace, get you something you always wanted, leave a note on the refrigerator, something, anything, etc. LOL. A person that loves you will go out of their way to show you – point blank!

• He/she loves and enjoys being physically close to you.

Think about it: Scientists have shown that the amount of body contact (physical touch) is vital to a person’s mental and physical development as an infant and our happiness as adults. So, if you love your partner – you’d want physical contact with them. Although, this should not be confused with sex; intimacy and sexual contact are also both important for most people in terms of expressing their love. But that’s another topic for another day…LOL

• He/she gives without being asked and accepts from you with gratitude.

Think about it: A person who truly loves you doesn’t need an excuse to give to you. They don’t expect anything in return but gratitude and appreciation from you. Someone who truly loves you wouldn't hold what they did for you over your head and would not play tit-for-tat games!

• He/she wants a future with you in it. He/she doesn’t just talk about it but they also start planning for it.

Think about it: A person who loves you will want to be with you for the long haul. Even if the relationship never makes it there, their intentions are clear – they want a future with you, can see themselves with you in the future, and/or plan for you to be a part of their future.

• He/she tells you he/she loves you.

Think about it: If your partner can’t say those three little words, then it’s not love. A person who loves you will shout it from the rooftops and they won’t care what anyone thinks about it. Point blank!

• You just know it – no doubting, no questioning, no wondering, no convincing or trying to make him/her love you and no strings attached. You look into his/her eyes and you know it. Something inside of you just knows.

Think about it: This is clear as the driven snow because it’s purely based on how you feel but at the same time it is one of the most subjective points due to it being based on your opinion and judgment. The heart sometimes wants what the heart wants and it blurs your judgment. So, pleeeease be careful with this one! LOL

Now....Hopefully this list helped a few of you out there!! But please note that this list is not comprehensive, only you know what feels right in your relationship. As always, communication is paramount for the success of any relationship. If you don’t feel like you’re receiving what you should from your mate, talk to them and express how you’re feeling. If you don’t see any progress towards what has been discussed after you’ve talked to them about your feelings, then it is time to truly evaluate or re-evaluate why you’re in a relationship with a person that does not love you. End of story! :-)

KHurly Girl

The Pursuit of Healthy Hair

As a youth, I always loved to style hair. I styled my own hair, my sisters’ hair, and the hair of friends. In high school, I decided that I wanted to become a hair stylist after graduation. I signed up for a program that would allow me to find out what Cosmetology was all about. Surprisingly though, I didn’t get the opportunity to do much “hair” while in Cosmetology class because we had to learn everything else as well…Go figure! Anyhow to make a long story short, I changed my decision about becoming a stylist and ended up attending college and becoming an Electrical Engineer of all things! LOL. But I never lost my love for hair and always dreamed of at least opening a salon/spa one day.

So, now here we are about 15 years plus down the road since those dreams of becoming a hair stylist and today I’m a newly natural hair girl who loves her curls! So, my thoughts on hair and hair care today are significantly different than what they were years ago when I was a long haired relaxed chick! :-) Today my beliefs about healthy hair go deeper than just healthy “looking” hair and have morphed into the overall idea that both what I put ON my hair and IN my body affect my hair. As a result, I like to focus on organic store bought and homemade concoctions that promote the growth of healthy hair and eating healthier for overall hair health. It’s been a journey that I’ve been on since those happy hair days as a youth but this new phase is something that I pride myself on doing because I know that my health is not being negatively impacted anymore by the chemicals in the products that I use on my hair/scalp.

For the future, my new goal is to promote healthy hair through the development of organic hair products and eventually open a natural salon where your mind is eased by the products that we use and promote. So, I hope that you’ll continue to check back in to learn healthy hair tips, style tips, product reviews, the progress against my own hair goals, and for any little tidbit of information I may want to discuss about hair…LOL. And along the way I hope that you will feel free to comment and share your hair stories as well!!

What's the Meaning of Life?

What can I say about life? Well, I am deeply enchanted with life! Why? Why not?! It’s a beautiful thing and I love mine. My life has not been all roses and lovely things. There have been thorns, bumpy roads, setbacks, hurt and disappointment but in the end there is nothing but JOY because I am living! I am making my way and there are so many people in this world that will never have the experiences I’ve had or say they’ve done the things I’ve done. This is MY life!

No matter what is happening in YOUR life at any given moment, the next day is a new day to start fresh! Your life is unique because no matter how many experiences you have, no other person will have those same exact experiences. This makes your life valuable to others because you can offer insight, opinions and experience that others have no firsthand experience about. You are the keeper of unique knowledge and understanding, which comprises YOUR LIFE!

In my day-to-day life, I try to always stay positive…to reflect…to embrace the good and the bad…to learn…to experience new things…to enjoy each day, hour, minute and second! Am I always chipper and spreading peace and love? That’s a resounding -- NO!! LOL, but when those down times hit I try not to stay there for too long because there is always someone somewhere wishing they could live the life that I’m living and that puts things in perspective for me.

So, in terms of what I want to discuss on my blog in regard to life – I want to talk about my experiences, my highs and my lows, what brings me joy and what brings me sadness, my inspirations and my want to inspire others, God in my life, my goals, my aspirations, my purpose and how all the things that I’ve learned can somehow help YOU! Why? Because part of my purpose in life is to help others!

Quote of the day: “Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.” – Booker T. Washington

Stay tuned, my friends… :-)

L...O...V...E!!

I love LOVE. I love the idea of love, I love loving another person that you know loves you back, I love receiving love, I love expressing and showing someone my love for them, I love the love you feel from family and the unconditional love you should feel from a partner – so yeah, I love LOVE! LOL. God even said that out of faith, hope and love, that love was the greatest of these. Here’s a little scripture to support my cause, I’m not making this up…LOL. Corinthians 13 says:

“1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

 13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”

Ok, so now we know how wonderful and important love is but sometimes “love” isn’t always what it’s cracked up to be. Sometimes you want to love and the person just doesn’t deserve your love. Sometimes you want so badly to be loved by someone else and they just can’t show you or give you what you need in return. Sometimes family, although blood related, doesn’t know how to express love or never showed you (or taught you) the real true meaning of love. Maybe you don’t know what love really means or how it feels or if you’ve ever experienced it before. Or maybe you know all about it and just want to reinforce the wonderfulness that is love by reading about it and trying to learn and make sense of it all. Well, my goals in regard to LOVE are to explore what it is, what it’s supposed to be, and what it’s not.

So, who am I in terms of determining what's meaningful in regards to love and why you should listen to anything I have to say about it?! Well, I’m not cupid and I don’t have a degree in love from a prestigious university (if there is such a thing…LOL) but what I do have is experience and I am always on the hunt for understanding! I have loved deeply and I have also entered into relationships and thought that I was in love but wasn’t, I have been engaged a few times yet never married (still working on that...LOL), I have been told I was loved and experienced love from others, I have felt unconditional love for another person, I have done things “in the name of love,” and I also know what it feels like when love is right (and unfortunately, wrong) and I’m patiently waiting for a man to show me that same love in return….So, I’ve got life experience with love and I love how it’s influenced my life in positive ways and how it’s made me make changes in my life. But in saying all this, let's remember that love never fails! People tell me all the time that I should write a book about my crazy “love” stories but how about a blog instead!? LOL. Stay tuned for interesting stories along the way and insight into this thing everyone is talking about, L-O-V-E!